fuckin-colege-not-answering-messages.-how-can-you-just-not-answer-a-message?-i-am-trying-to-do-colege-this-year.-i-make-the-best-art-in-the-world-and-need-to-learn-buisines-and-paperwork.-id-like-to-apologise-to-the-colege-about-my-school-seting-me-up-to-be-completely-useless-but-it-gave-me-extreme-angziety-and-i-didn't-do-any-work-at-all-in-school.-however-i-am-not-hapy-with-the-colege-about-saying-they-are-good-with-people-with-angziety.(social-angziety-isn't-real-anyway,we-are-not-sposed-to-do-no-work-and-just-talk-a-lot-of-nonsence,-people-need-to-shut-the-fuck-up-a-bit-more.)-they-mentiond-previous-students-who-had-social-angziety-and-are-much-better.-they-are-wrong-i-had-angziety-every-day-and-puked-almost-everyday-before-school-and-dont-eat.-i-cured-myself-and-was-ok-before-going-to-colege.-but-they-force-angziety-on-people-withall-their-nonsence.but-i-do-need-this.-i-do-want-to-finish-my-3rd-year-and-get-good-marks-instead-os-scraping-a-pass.-only-bout-2-of-us-turned-up-on-time-everyday-for-acces,-the-others-took-days-off-or-just-didn't-turn-up.-i-was-unable-to-take-colege-seriously-at-first-cos-of-this,-and-the-colege-turned-away-some-good-artists-on-the-acces-course.-it's-not-my-fault,-i-never-had-a-computer-until-i-started-the-course.-i-need-to-learn-photpshop-and-all-that-and-want-to-do-tidy-sketchbooks-and-the-best-portfolio-in-the-world.-i-didn't-get-the-student-finance-funding-last-time-and-had-3-4-jobs-last-time.-i-also-only-took-the-first-cleaning-job-just-to-say-i-have-a-job.-my-family-told-me-to.-so-i-had-to-leave-at-like-3-pm-just-mor-the-1-hour,-instead-of-catching-the-free-bus-back-and-staying-in-colege-to-concentrate-properly-om-my-art.-i-wanted-to-talk-to-miranda-and-get-her-help-on-my-work,-then-ask-her-out-and-ask-her-to-mary-me,-send-her-kid-to-france-or-wherever,-have-10-of-my-own-kids-with-her,-sell-my-art-for-milions-and-live-happily-ever-after.-should-have-done-that-instead-of-listening-to-my-family-teling-me-to-get-a-job.-yes-you-you-dumb-fucks,-pretending-to-help-offering-to-buy-my-spoons-for-£20-60-80-£120,-when-they-are-spending-£300-on-other-peoples-shity-paintings-that-lookj-like-kids-drawings.-these-are-fuckin-hand-made-from-hard-wood-you-dumb-fucks,-they-take-a-month-to-make-over-40hrs-per-week.-not-printed-yout-100-at-a-time-from-lime.there-are-plenty-of-them-around.-fuck-sake.-dont-come-to-me-again-unless-you-have-£30,000-£60,000.-jesus-fuckin-christ.-you-people-have-everything,house,cars-kids-tvs-and-all-that-shit.-i-dont-have-60p-to-buy-milk.-coffe-with-no-milk-and-chips-beans-and-bacon-everyday-this-week.
and-one-of-those-jobs-i-stil-havent-been-paid-for,spectrum-cleaning,not-even-suplying-bin-bags-and-blue-cloths-and-new-mop-heads-for-a-fuckin-pub-floor.-i-am-skint-and-am-going-to-kill-gary-or-the-retard-with-the-briefcase-if-i-see-them.-police-dont-give-a-fuck-i-dont-think,-i-did-warn-them,-they-dont-care,so-that-is-a-green-light-i-think.-not-paying-is-stealing,-and-they-stole-hundreds.-i-have-seen-the-retard-with-briefcase-a-few-times-but-he-is-smaller-than-me-and-that-is-tiny,-but-now-i-raly-am-skint-so-am-going-to-fuck-him-infront-of-all-the-old-women-in-bangor-next-time-i-see-him.-i-dont-like-speaking-english-and-wont-ask-for-my-money,-i-will-just-stab,then-stabstabstabstab.-if-i-am-not-doing-colege-i-am-going-to-kill-rich-old-peado-men-and-thiefs.-i-have-applied-fort-dole-money-and-not-had-anything.-i-am-being-pushed-over-the-edge-and-going-to-pull-people-with-me.-police-and-nobody-cares,-they-want-this-to-hapen.they-love-it-i-think.
 
Trips-i've-had-quite-recently-include-god-saying-fuck-it-and-just-splashing-paint-everywhere-over-everything.i-have-also-seen-the-green-lights-every-where-for-me.-depending-on-which-meanings-i-decode,i-am-not-interested-in-any-of-them,-maybe-just-1.-i-am-a-broken-computer.-and-the-red-on-the-floor,-just-red-everywhere.-tried-cleaning-and-cleaning-but-stil-red-everywhere.-i-am-not-to-blame-about-it,-i-didn't-know-and-i-blame-the-others.-i-have-had-my-7years-for-it.-i-would-like-to-reflect-this-trip-back-to-wherever-it-came-from-i-do-not-deserve-it-and-i-blame-the-others.-i-am-a-jesus.